Kyoraku's Journal
by sparklepinkpixie
Summary: Over 2100 years ago? Could it really have been so long that I met my dear old friend Jushiro?  Shunsui Kyoraku recount's his final hours with his oldest and closest friend.  Rated T for death/tragedy, just incase :/


**Ok so this is my first attempt at actually posting something I wrote, so reviews and critique would be VERY greatly appreciated :)  
**

**Oh and I guess;  
****Disclaimer: I do not own, nor claim to own Bleach or its characters, they are all creations of Tite Kubo**

_**Italics **_**at one point are supposed to show Shunsui's thoughts at that moment.**

**Thanks for reading.**

* * *

****  
June 12, entry number 786'940,

786'940, could that number really be right?  
One entry per day since I had started my training within The Soul Reaper Academy over 2100 years ago.  
Had it really been so long ago that Jushiro and I first met?  
My mind cast's back across those supposedly long years and my life seems to pass by me in a flash. I feel as though that first meeting happened only recently.  
Regardless of the exceptionally long lives we are gifted with as shinigami, Death itself manages to creep up on us. Throughout these centuries, my dear friend has been plagued by this fatal disease, and now it appears, that the years have finally caught up on him.  
Unohana herself informs me that 'this time, things aren't looking so good' for my dear old Ukitake.

These past few days I've spent almost every waking hour within the squad 13 compound watching over my oldest and closest friend. The beginnings of the long hot summer days were taking their tole on Jushiro's health. Upon Retsu's order's he was confined to his room to keep his condition from 'flaring up'. This was nothing new, If I were to look back across these journals I would encounter countless entries reading the same way. I only wish I could say this one would have the same ending as it's predecessors.

I opened the door leading to Ukitakes private quarters early this morning with his breakfast tray in hand. I heard a weakened, groggy call as I backed my way into the room carefully balancing the tray of food, drink and medication I had collected from the squad 4 barracks earlier in the morning. When I was fully inside the room I turned to greet my friend and found myself stop dead in my tracks. I could feel my eyes widen and my mouth fall open in shock. In all these years I had never seem him look so sickly. I watched him struggle to balance his weight on his hands to pull himself up off his futon. I stared in blinding disbelief as every muscle in his once powerful body quivered under the pressure of the menial task. A low groan from his throat dragged me out of my comatose state and I clambered to place the tray on the table and help him up. Over night he had become so pale and as I wrapped my arm around him to help him up I could feel how fragile and thin he had become.

He quietly picked at his breakfast, forcing down as much as his body could handle, coughing between gulps. After he was done I helped him take his medication and found myself outstretching my arms to comfort him as he coughed violently. I stroked his long white hair from his sweat slicked face and and rubbed reassuringly on his back. For hour he lay motionless, staring blankly out the window. I on the other hand couldn't bring myself to focus on anything in particular. My mind raced and my eyes seemed to mimic my thought as they darted from one point of the room to another. I thought back on all the time I had spent with the white haired captain, of meeting him, of training together, graduating and each become captains of one of the 13 Squads. I remembered fighting along side him, of waiting patiently by his hospital bed each time he had an attack. I looked down at my dearest friend, I had never seen him so look so lifeless, so defeated. Without speaking he seemed to cry out to me his pain and suffering. The disease had finally taken over his body, and this time Ukitake was letting it win. I choked my tears in realisation that soon, I would lose him. He had led such a hard life, and as long as I was around I wasn't about to let him suffer anymore.

I left his bed side briefly and opened the doors leading out to his small and beautifully maintained garden. The cool evening air seeped into the room and the heady scent of the night blooming flowers drifted in on the breeze. I glanced back to see Jushiro watching me intently, a genuine smile spreading across his face as he pondered my actions. I grabbed a blanket from the closet and gathered two small cups from the cupboard along with his hidden stash of sake. I layed the blanket on the floor by the open doors facing the garden and poured some drinks. I returned to his bedside once more and held out my hand signaling him to take it.  
"No way your gonna sit around and mope while I'm here Jushiro  
I cocked him a smile and hooked my arm around him, leading him toward the blanket.

Jushiro sat propped up against the door frame enjoying the cool evening air that caressed his face. He sipped peacefully on his drink and stared out across his garden.  
"Thank you Kyoraku, really, you never were one to tiptoe around me when it came to my illness. Thank you, it really means alot to me old friend."  
I smiled and nodded my approval as took one final swig of my drink;  
"To friendship!"  
"To friendship."

I left him to settle back to sleep as the darkness consumed the room. The cool night air soothed a a sweet smile onto his sleeping face. I looked down at him and felt a saddening smile creep onto my face as the contented relief spread across his pale features. As I began to leave, I felt a weak tug at my hand and turned around to see his smiling face shining up at me. There was a sting of fear in his eyes when he asked;  
"Please, Shunsui, stay. I don't want to be alone when..."  
I nodded and once again fought back the tears that were forming behind my eyes. I sat at the end of bed and pulled him up to rest his head on my lap. I pulled the blankets over his now lithe frame and my fingers through his long hair to comfort him. I glared into the darkness of the room and let tears fall freely from my eyes, I choked back the lump forming in my throat and help back the sobs. I wouldn't break down now, not when he needed me to be strong for him. He coughed lightly and forced his words through heavy breaths.  
"Shunsui, I'm so sorry" he paused to cough and clear his throat. "I'm sorry I've been such a burden to you these years. I only wish I could be strong like you." I swallowed hard, forcing away the pain in my chest, my throat, my eyes and my head. _Can't break now Shun, not now!  
_"I want you to know, I'm not afraid of dying, what I'm afraid of is leaving you behind. I know your trying to be strong for me old friend, I know that right now your probably telling yourself not to break down in front of me" his words became more spaced and his breathing weakened, "I just need you to know how much I value your friendship Shunsui, you've always been there for me, no matter what. So now, I need you to be strong not for me, but for yourself Shun, I need to know that when I go, your going to be ok." I cracked. My body shivered, my voice whimpered in total defeat and tears flooded down my cheeks.  
"I want you to know that I love you my friend, my brother.  
He turned his face one last time to cast me a knowing smile before his eyes drifted shut.  
"I love you too Jyu"  
I sobbed frantically when that soft smile appeared once again on his face and watched him slip into unending sleep. I rocked him in my arms, pulling him close to my chest and gently pressed a small kiss to his forehead  
"Goodbye my dear Jushiro."

Captain Jushiro Ukitake died in the early hours of June 12th. He passed away peacefully in his sleep after centuries of battling his illness. Though gone, he will never be forgotten. Rest peacefully my friend, your suffering is finally over.

* * *

**First time I've ever had the guts to actually post anything I've ever done, heh.  
****So Jushiro and Ukitake are two of my favourite Bleach characters, I just love how their friendship has lasted through the years, it's sort of beautiful.  
****Anyways, I know this is a morbid story for my first ever attempt but I just wanted to write about their amazing friendship :)  
****I know it won't get alot of readers with it being a Tragedy/Friendship one-shot but this is just something I was really inspired to write, so if anyone out there is reading and enjoyed this I would really appreciate a review ^-^**  
**Thanks for reading 3  
Sparks x **


End file.
